Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
