marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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