In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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