there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
nutella sex= disaster
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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