Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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