I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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