No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Randomize
