i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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