yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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