Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
