apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
