Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
