All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
