Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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