Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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