ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
So much Jack, so little girl.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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