I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
