Christians are straight up FREAKS
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
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