Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
