We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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