it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Found the puke drawer
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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