Michael Bay diarrhea
I'm passing your future prison.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Randomize
