I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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