is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
