he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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