i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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