Got a toothbrush?
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
