hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
