I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
