I swear she didn't look like that last week.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
