Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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