If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
