sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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