but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I could make wine with my vomit
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize