I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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