You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize
