pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
