i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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