Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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