I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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