so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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