new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom said you looked used
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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