quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
