There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
