and my herpes radar will keep us safe
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
