So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize