Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.

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(773): hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her. http://tfl.nu/rlge

Replies (8) Good night (977) Bad night (862)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair

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(613): Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair http://tfl.nu/oa8m

Replies (14) Good night (1456) Bad night (621)
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(415): View more from California

I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?

(510): View more from California

I hope so

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(415): I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die? (510): I hope so http://tfl.nu/tt2l

Replies (41) Good night (2288) Bad night (5323)
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(718): View more from New York

i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.

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(718): i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined. http://tfl.nu/aopw

Replies (67) Good night (810) Bad night (4632)
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(804): View more from Virginia

ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"

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(804): ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty" http://tfl.nu/zpfk

Replies (9) Good night (1124) Bad night (4467)
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(530): View more from California

And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?

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(530): And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion? http://tfl.nu/zsah

Replies (6) Good night (2012) Bad night (1110)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.

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(843): I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier. http://tfl.nu/n87w

Replies (5) Good night (3753) Bad night (1072)
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(334): View more from Alabama

thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week

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(334): thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week http://tfl.nu/vfml

Replies (13) Good night (3100) Bad night (970)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.

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(337): Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex. http://tfl.nu/wf1h

Replies (11) Good night (746) Bad night (2509)
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(720): View more from Colorado

She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.

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(720): She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship. http://tfl.nu/wvbn

Replies (15) Good night (601) Bad night (1517)
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(305): View more from Florida

We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.

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(305): We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened. http://tfl.nu/a50c

Replies (3) Good night (814) Bad night (421)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"

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(701): I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever" http://tfl.nu/o3s0

Replies (2) Good night (662) Bad night (367)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.

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(203): She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle. http://tfl.nu/9n9g

Replies (5) Good night (1215) Bad night (355)
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(315): View more from New York

I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.

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(315): I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times. http://tfl.nu/z7n6

Replies (2) Good night (439) Bad night (373)
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(206): View more from Washington

I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'

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(206): I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!' http://tfl.nu/jna3

Replies (1) Good night (653) Bad night (217)

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