im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
