Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
