'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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