I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
