so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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